A therapist is not a matchmaker, yet mental health professionals do provide services that can help you figure out what is going on with your dating life. Trying to date again after a divorce can be difficult, especially if you can't figure out why on your own. Whether you are experiencing serious anxiety about going on dates or you can't manage to launch a serious relationship, going to individual therapy can help you by providing these three benefits.
1. Improve Your Interpersonal Skills
Dating is a lot like going on business interviews. You need to be able to impress the other person by building a connection. While you may feel as though you do everything you can to put your best face forward, it is possible that your interpersonal skills need development. A therapist can help you identify areas where you can improve. For instance, learning how to engage in active listening can help you learn more about dates while showing them that you care about what they have to say. This can help you to overcome issues such as talking too much out of nervousness. Learning how to communicate better can also help you to sail through those first few dates and continue to build a relationship.
2. Manage Past Traumas
Your past experiences might affect your ability to feel comfortable dating someone. If your prior marriage or divorce proceedings were volatile, then you may still be dealing with fears that make it hard to trust someone else again. Anger, guilt, and shame are negative emotions that arise from trauma and can hold you back in the dating game. You could also have traumas that go back even further before your previous marriage. Therapy is a safe place where you can go to talk through your past trauma.
3. Identify Thought Patterns That Hold You Back
One of the primary goals of therapy is to change your mindset. Negative self-talk includes things such as thinking that no one will ever find you attractive or that you will never be able to find love again. You may also still be holding yourself to specific standards for dating that narrow down your selection of potential partners, or you could still hear your ex-spouse's voice listing off everything that you do wrong. Your therapist will work with you to identify thought patterns that you can change. Together, you can work on strategies that help you shift your mindset to success.
If you think therapy might help you confidently date again, consider contacting services such as Rinehart Institute.